Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Baseline

I had my base line for FET #3 yesterday. I'm VERY glad to say that it went well and I started estrogen today. I am so happy! I really really hate the side effects from lupron depot and can't wait till my estrogen levels get higher so these hot flashes end and I can get a good nights sleep again.

I have a lot on my mind at the moment but I'm not quite sure how to put it into words. My husband is a very private person and thus I tend to me also. Being private is a good thing because if people don't know about our infertility then they can't say anything stupid. But it also means I don't get the support I need sometimes. And at church when pregnant woman or new moms get a lot of attention and help I get jealous. Where is everyone when I need them? But then I remind myself, if people don't know I'm struggling they can't help. I'm just barely starting to be more open about mentioning my miscarriage in passing to people. Mostly it's when they ask how I lost weight. Well I had a miscarriage, so my thyroid crashed and then I had 2 surgeries etc. probably to much information but oh well. It feels good to be open about it. But I hate seeing the look of sadness on their face when I mention it. So I usually swiftly change the subject...again not sure why.

I've been open with a few friends about my up coming FET and it feels good to be able to confide in people about it.


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