IVF nightmares

So I feel more relaxed and have a "what ever" attitude when it comes to this IVF. However that doesn't stop me from having TONS of questions for my RE: Don't I need to be on a suppression like Ganerellix when I start the LH? (right now I'm on no suppression-as I was on the BCP not Lupron) and they told me to start the LH on Tuesday night. I'm thinking I should be on Ganerellix at the same time. Too much LH can be a bad thing so I'd like my own bodies hormones suppressed. not to mention doing Ganerellix earlier could potentially help me stim a day or two longer. I'm not doctor but this is my 4th IVF and my 7th time on these drugs so yes I know my body!

I also had a nightmare last night that my IVF was canceled due to no response. *sigh* so it appears deep down inside I'm scared to death. But I will not admit it. I refuse to give in to my fear. All I need is 2 great quality embryo's for a 2dt. I don't need a ton of follicles. Essentially all I really need is 5-6. I have a crappy fertilization rate with ICSI so if I have 5-6 eggs I'm guaranteed to have at least 2-3 embryo's to chose from.

I was going to work today. I can either take the day off paid today or work and take the day off paid later this year. I was going to work today and use the day off for my IVF but oh well. I decided to stay home. I may regret it later but I decided to not live my life around my IVF. I'll use a sick day for my retrieval and save my vacation time. I may end up working the day of my transfer. Sitting home on my butt won't help me get pregnant. I know some woman like bed rest but #1 I don't want to use a vacation or sick day for my IVF if not needed and #2 I really don't think it helps pregnancy rates. And #3 it's a 2dt not a 5dt so bed rest is not as relevant for me as it might be for a 5dt.

ok I'm going to try to go back to bed now.